Post by owlfeather on Nov 28, 2008 21:47:03 GMT
The following are areas that I think need to be fixed or modified. They contain possible spoilers. I have CAPITALIZED words to draw attention to them. These are all entry numbers.
------------------------
#300 'There is evil treachery at work AND the enemy already has plans afoot to thwart your quest,'
#314 'There is evil treachery at work WHEN the enemy already has plans afoot to thwart your quest.'
300 makes no sense. I was going to suggest that AND be changed to IF, but then wolf recalls the conversation again later at 314, where he recalls WHEN. 300 needs to have AND changed to WHEN.
------------------------
#320 (Helghast with magic spear)
At this point you might not have a pack. Footnote #1 for entry 31 suggests that you should consider that you get a new pack from Lord Rhygar if you don't have one. I recommend a similar footnote here, suggesting that the player can take the Helghast's pack if they don't currently have one.
------------------------
#106 (Helghast with magic spear)
Looking at www.geocities.com/todkrank/fernmost/lwea.html we can see a list of monsters in all the books and their stats. Helghasts tend to have around 22/30, which is what we have here.
I think the stats here should be lower. The description says that there is a fallen knight next to the Helghast, clearly the magic spear's previous owner. Do Helghasts regenerate? If not, surely the knight must have wounded the Helghast before being killed, so it should still be wounded. He did manage to pin it to the ground before dying after all, so this suggests the knight was winning. Also, since the spear is still in the Helghast when we find it (and it was desperate enough to hear us passing by and call for help), that suggests the Helghast is too weak/too wounded to do it itself.
Finally, given that this is our very first encounter with a Helghast and it will be a very tough fight for everyone, most especially for those with low CS, made even worse with the -2 EP per round, I strongly suggest lowering the creature's EP. Instead of a fully healed Helghast of 22/30, I suggest a very wounded Helghast of 22/15, or even 22/10. Those with low CS or EP should be able to defeat this, especially given the spear's importance later on.
------------------------
#182 suggest - 'or you can return to 231 and choose what to do next.'
I strongly disagree that having a kai skill should punish you. At 231, you have several options of what to do next. If you have Tracking, you are railroaded into 182 then 177 and forced to return to the tavern, where you cannot leave. This prevents you from exploring the city and possibly getting a new pack, meals, or weapons.
You are not in combat and, aside from night falling, are not under any time constraint. There is no reason why those with Tracking shouldn't be able to explore the city like everybody else.
------------------------
#145 footnote 12 "Due to the loss of endurance AFTER TAKING THE POTION, it is probably intended that you may not restore 3 endurance points from eating the Laumspur as you normally would."
suggest -
"Due to the loss of 5 ENDURANCE AFTERWARDS, it is probably intended that you may not restore 3 endurance points from eating the Laumspur as you normally would."
You are not taking a potion here. The text in 145 says you are eating the Laumspur leaves from plants picked earlier, which the footnote also mentions. Talking about a potion is just confusing.
Instead of "5 endurance afterwards," you might also consider, "5 endurance after eating the leaves."
------------------------
#323 "As you walk through the pouring rain, three suspicious men appear from an alley TO start to follow you."
suggest -
"As you walk through the pouring rain, three suspicious men appear from an alley AND start to follow you."
------------------------
#337 footnote 30 "Though you keep YOUR Backpack itself, you lose everything it contained in addition to your Weapons and the Chainmail Waistcoat, if you had one."
suggest -
"Though you keep THE Backpack itself, you lose everything it contained in addition to your Weapons and the Chainmail Waistcoat, if you had one."
------------------------
#344 (fight with 6 Helghast and Lord Rhygar and his men)
This is another case where having a skill punishes you. At 254 you can choose to fight or flee. If you flee, there is a 10% chance of instant death. If you fight, you take 2 EP damage and still retreat, but with 0% chance of death. If you have Sixth Sense, you are forced to flee and risk the 10% chance of death.
I suggest either redirecting people back to 254 where they can choose to fight or flee, or list the options here of fight - 69, flee - 183.
------------------------
#295 "Your curiosity soon gives way to the realization that you must evade them or be trampled TO by the sheer weight of their numbers."
eliminate TO.
------------------------
#5 / #17 (fight with same Helghast)
Every single fight with Helghasts up to this point mentions them attacking you with Mindblast, unless you have Mindshield -2 EP per round bla bla bla. Why is it not mentioned here? Does it have a headache?
These entries should mention the Helghast attacking you with its mind.
------------------------
#252 (Port Bax)
Yet another case where Tracking hurts you. If from 265 you go to City Hall, you not only learn the way to the Consulate, but you also learn about red passes. With Tracking, you miss this info, which may cause you to lose gold on a white pass, or your life with the official papers.
I recommend that if Tracking can remind you of the correct way to the Consulate, it should also remind you of Red passes. Or, give players the option of exploring city hall anyways, and learn about them that way.
------------------------
errata 126 - gaol not goal. Entry 126 correctly has gaol, but the errata mentioning it incorrectly has goal.
------------------------
#300 'There is evil treachery at work AND the enemy already has plans afoot to thwart your quest,'
#314 'There is evil treachery at work WHEN the enemy already has plans afoot to thwart your quest.'
300 makes no sense. I was going to suggest that AND be changed to IF, but then wolf recalls the conversation again later at 314, where he recalls WHEN. 300 needs to have AND changed to WHEN.
------------------------
#320 (Helghast with magic spear)
At this point you might not have a pack. Footnote #1 for entry 31 suggests that you should consider that you get a new pack from Lord Rhygar if you don't have one. I recommend a similar footnote here, suggesting that the player can take the Helghast's pack if they don't currently have one.
------------------------
#106 (Helghast with magic spear)
Looking at www.geocities.com/todkrank/fernmost/lwea.html we can see a list of monsters in all the books and their stats. Helghasts tend to have around 22/30, which is what we have here.
I think the stats here should be lower. The description says that there is a fallen knight next to the Helghast, clearly the magic spear's previous owner. Do Helghasts regenerate? If not, surely the knight must have wounded the Helghast before being killed, so it should still be wounded. He did manage to pin it to the ground before dying after all, so this suggests the knight was winning. Also, since the spear is still in the Helghast when we find it (and it was desperate enough to hear us passing by and call for help), that suggests the Helghast is too weak/too wounded to do it itself.
Finally, given that this is our very first encounter with a Helghast and it will be a very tough fight for everyone, most especially for those with low CS, made even worse with the -2 EP per round, I strongly suggest lowering the creature's EP. Instead of a fully healed Helghast of 22/30, I suggest a very wounded Helghast of 22/15, or even 22/10. Those with low CS or EP should be able to defeat this, especially given the spear's importance later on.
------------------------
#182 suggest - 'or you can return to 231 and choose what to do next.'
I strongly disagree that having a kai skill should punish you. At 231, you have several options of what to do next. If you have Tracking, you are railroaded into 182 then 177 and forced to return to the tavern, where you cannot leave. This prevents you from exploring the city and possibly getting a new pack, meals, or weapons.
You are not in combat and, aside from night falling, are not under any time constraint. There is no reason why those with Tracking shouldn't be able to explore the city like everybody else.
------------------------
#145 footnote 12 "Due to the loss of endurance AFTER TAKING THE POTION, it is probably intended that you may not restore 3 endurance points from eating the Laumspur as you normally would."
suggest -
"Due to the loss of 5 ENDURANCE AFTERWARDS, it is probably intended that you may not restore 3 endurance points from eating the Laumspur as you normally would."
You are not taking a potion here. The text in 145 says you are eating the Laumspur leaves from plants picked earlier, which the footnote also mentions. Talking about a potion is just confusing.
Instead of "5 endurance afterwards," you might also consider, "5 endurance after eating the leaves."
------------------------
#323 "As you walk through the pouring rain, three suspicious men appear from an alley TO start to follow you."
suggest -
"As you walk through the pouring rain, three suspicious men appear from an alley AND start to follow you."
------------------------
#337 footnote 30 "Though you keep YOUR Backpack itself, you lose everything it contained in addition to your Weapons and the Chainmail Waistcoat, if you had one."
suggest -
"Though you keep THE Backpack itself, you lose everything it contained in addition to your Weapons and the Chainmail Waistcoat, if you had one."
------------------------
#344 (fight with 6 Helghast and Lord Rhygar and his men)
This is another case where having a skill punishes you. At 254 you can choose to fight or flee. If you flee, there is a 10% chance of instant death. If you fight, you take 2 EP damage and still retreat, but with 0% chance of death. If you have Sixth Sense, you are forced to flee and risk the 10% chance of death.
I suggest either redirecting people back to 254 where they can choose to fight or flee, or list the options here of fight - 69, flee - 183.
------------------------
#295 "Your curiosity soon gives way to the realization that you must evade them or be trampled TO by the sheer weight of their numbers."
eliminate TO.
------------------------
#5 / #17 (fight with same Helghast)
Every single fight with Helghasts up to this point mentions them attacking you with Mindblast, unless you have Mindshield -2 EP per round bla bla bla. Why is it not mentioned here? Does it have a headache?
These entries should mention the Helghast attacking you with its mind.
------------------------
#252 (Port Bax)
Yet another case where Tracking hurts you. If from 265 you go to City Hall, you not only learn the way to the Consulate, but you also learn about red passes. With Tracking, you miss this info, which may cause you to lose gold on a white pass, or your life with the official papers.
I recommend that if Tracking can remind you of the correct way to the Consulate, it should also remind you of Red passes. Or, give players the option of exploring city hall anyways, and learn about them that way.
------------------------
errata 126 - gaol not goal. Entry 126 correctly has gaol, but the errata mentioning it incorrectly has goal.